Oh Holy Night

Last Friday, I spent an evening Christmas caroling with my 2 children, extended family and about 150 other folks in the packed “Orchard Chapel” in Hampton Falls, New Hampshire. Leading us in song was Rev. “Bobby” Thompson, who’s baritone voice set the bass tone amidst the bucolic stillness. His Oh Holy Night solo moved the chapel timbers, and the hearts of the listeners. I had a lovely evening being together with my grown kids, their aunt, uncle and their children, sharing our group connection with other folks I’d never met before and may never see again. It was a poignant moment in time.

What struck me most though, was Rev. Thompson, before our final carol, encouraging us to go out into the world and to be a little kinder, a little more compassionate, to help a stranger or even just hold a door for someone. Maybe pay it forward in the coffee line . . . In short, to let ourselves be a bit more kind of our fellow humans. He reminded us of our responsibility to one another.

Reverend Bobby is a good teammate.

The best teams are made up of individuals who support each other unconditionally. There are teams chock full of talent that seem to always fall short. And there are teams seemingly lacking in talent yet full of “togetherness” that succeed against all odds. That’s where support and connection come in. Teams can’t win without it, and oddsmakers can’t quantify it. Indeed, no one can succeed without it. In this sense, we are only as good - as whole - as the support of the groups we belong to - team, family, work group, town, country etc.

Sometimes it’s just a pat on the back, a quick hug, a random compliment, a look in the eye or a smile in tacit connection. I have been reminded of this recently, as my 2 children, Brett and Larsen have been with me for a couple weeks before heading west again and re-embarking on their respective careers. Their consistent and often unexpected acts of kindness toward me, (including simply asking me how my day is going) ensures that my “well is full” as the New Year begins.

And while many people at this time of year will no doubt resolve to become more fit, to accumulate more wealth or to find romance or to clean out the attic - all worthy endeavors - perhaps we should also resolve to cultivate compassion, kindness, - friendship - towards our fellow humans while we’re on this very earthly - and finite - journey together.

Last night during the after-dinner conversation around the table, someone shared a story of a difficult experience they’d had as a kid. This led us to each tell a story along those lines. Next, we each shared a joyful highlight from 2023. Eyes got misty as stories of feeling lost on a bus as a child, peeing their pants on the way to camp (several!), unable to recite a passage in English class, finding love, success as a leader or bringing a baby into the world. In our personal triumphs and challenges we re-affirmed our common humanity.

It reminded me of a short essay Brett wrote for her college application 11 years ago. When asked to describe a resonant image through a window, she chose to depict looking in to the dining room from outside . . . a summer evening, the big oak table, people all around it chatting by candlelight, the heartfelt hum of connection in a place where she experienced the gift of belonging.

Thanks Bobby, for your inspiration, and for being such a good teammate. 

Oh Holy Night.

Yours in Practice,

Pete